Building a Strong Support System for Couples Dealing with Anxiety
In any relationship, having a strong support system is essential. Having people to hold you up and cheer you on when things get hard can make all the difference. This can be especially true when one or both partners are dealing with anxiety. A support system can provide a sense of safety, a sanctuary even, within the relationship. But how do you go about building a strong support system? In this blog, our Couples Therapists at Sharp Wellness will share tips for managing anxiety in a relationship learned from year of Couples Therapy!
What Can Cause Anxiety in a Relationship?
Anxiety in a relationship can stem from either the individual, the relationship itself, or both. Fear of abandonment, not feeling seen or heard, and patterns of interaction that become self-perpetuating can all contribute to anxiety. Disrupting these patterns has to happen before any change can occur. This is why having a support system can be so helpful.
Consider Carefully Who You Choose
The first step is to evaluate who will be part of it. Ask yourself, “Is this person a friend of the marriage?” This doesn't necessarily mean this person has to be friends with both you and your partner (though that certainly doesn't hurt). It means, rather, that this person should be in your relationship's corner, not joining in on trashing your spouse or even theirs.
However, They Should Be a Safe Place to Vent, Express Your Feelings, and Receive Validation.
This kind of support can do wonders for one's mental health and, thus, the health of your relationship. But, if they are making character attacks or showing contempt, then this person is not in your corner and is not supportive of your relationship. These people you need to be wary of.
What the Role of Your Support System Should Be
As a friend of the marriage, their role should be to provide a listening ear, to remind you both of the good things in your relationship, and help with problem-solving issues that come up. They should be a voice of reason and perspective when things seem overwhelming. When you are feeling overwhelmed, they can help you get perspective and reaffirm that the anxiety is temporary.
For example, when you are feeling overwhelmed because your partner is feeling anxious, they can remind you that this is not a reflection of who your partner is as a person and that the anxiety will pass with proper self-care and support. Or, if you're feeling anxious because your partner has put off a difficult task, your support system can remind you that it is not a reflection of how much they care about the relationship, but rather an issue with time management.
Abuse Is Not Tolerated
If you feel that you are the victim of domestic violence, it is important to remember that your safety comes first — seek help from a mental health professional. In this scenario, we are much less concerned about the perception of your partner and your safety becomes the focus. Consulting a mental health professional can help you feel empowered and equip you with the proper tools to heal. Your support system can supplement this work, but it cannot replace it.
Ways Your Support System Can Be There for You
Before any change can occur in your relationship with your partner, there should be open and honest communication about what is being noticed and how it is impacting both of you. This way, you are joining against the anxiety instead of blaming each other for it. Your support system can help you and your partner communicate these difficult topics in a productive way and help you to come up with solutions.
Talk About It
Talking about it is the most important thing you can do. It's helpful to have someone like a trusted family member, friend, or therapist who can help you to navigate the anxiety together. These trusted individuals can help you and your partner navigate open and honest communication about your feelings and needs. But also the anxiety that is present in the relationship.
Creating Self-Soothing Behaviors and Rituals
Each individual partner can create self-soothing behaviors or create some that you both can do together. These can range from practicing meditation to watching cat videos. If you notice that one partner is feeling particularly overwhelmed, it can be helpful to have something calming like a bath, going on a walk, or watching a movie. Doing these activities together can help to create an environment of safety and security where both partners feel heard and understood.
Working With a Mental Health Professional
If the anxiety is impacting your relationship, it may be time to find a therapist who works with couples through Couples Therapy to help navigate this challenge together. A mental health professional will be able to help you and your partner find ways to cope with the anxiety and understand how it is impacting your relationship. With their help, you can create a safe space for both of you to share your feelings and thoughts and come up with strategies to help manage the anxiety.
You and Your Partner Are Worthy of an Anxiety Free Relationship
No matter how difficult it may be, it’s important to find a support system to help you and your partner navigate the anxiety. Open communication, self-soothing activities, and working with a mental health professional are all great ways to combat the anxiety that may be present in your relationship. You and your partner are worthy of a relationship that is full of safety, love, and understanding. So don’t be afraid to reach out for help and utilize your support system.
Interested in Therapy for Couples in McKinney, TX?
You and your partner can form a strong, healthy relationship and team up against anxiety. With the help from your support system and the guidance of a mental health professional, you can work together to create the relationship you deserve. At Sharp Wellness, our team of skilled therapists is here to help you and your partner find ways to cope with and manage your anxiety. We'll find the best strategies for you and your partner to make sure that both of you feel safe, supported, and understood. If you are interested in beginning Therapy for Anxiety:
Book an Appointment or Contact us at contact@sharpwellnessandcounseling.com
Learn more about our services
Start forming the support system and self-soothing behaviors that you need today!
Other Therapy Services At Sharp Wellness
At Sharp Wellness, our therapists understand that you and your partner may have more going on than just anxiety. That’s why we offer a variety of therapy services for individuals, couples, and families. We have a location in Birmingham, AL, and Mckinney, TX, and offer a variety of therapy services to support you and your family. We offer Individual Counseling, Therapy for Teens and Adolescents, Couples and Marriage Counseling, Therapy for Trauma, LGBTQIA+ Affirming Therapy, and Group Therapy. We also offer Couple's Intensives at our Mckinney, TX location.